In honor of World Suicide Prevention Day. My attempt as a young teenage girl with no mental health care given.

In honor of World Suicide Prevention Day.

http://www.samhsa.gov/

September is National Recovery Month celebrating 25 years.

I have worked closely with the physically and mentally challenged as well as befriended them. I have taught them class and learned much from them as well. I have taught a class on suicide prevention and handed out my personal contact numbers in case anyone needed to speak directly to me or to have someone to turn to over the holidays during a time of grief, pain and loss for many. I have not had a suicide attempt as an adult but did have a suicide attempt as a young teenage girl overdosing on Tylenol. I was taken to Newton Medical and treated but receive no mental health care at the time only treating my physical injuries and pumping my stomach. I vowed then that I would never have another suicide attempt and I have not. I cannot say that the thought has not crossed my mind from time to time but I have never had a plan or mapped out a suicide plan. Only wondering if life would be easier if I were not a part of it. Given the parental alienation I have suffered over the last ten years it has been death within itself. The living dead. A death that no mother should have to experience. The loss of a child or children. Overnight mine were gone. Even given  there has never been the first hint, suggestion, implication nor accusation as to any wrong doing on my behalf as a mother nor as a wife I have suffered parental alienation and estrangement for over ten years now. Even given the many wins to my full behalf in court and the Court’s direct Order’s and Opinions along with wishes of family therapy I still suffer but have vowed to never have another suicide attempt. I look back now at my teenage years and wonder why I never received any mental health services at the time of my suicide attempt as a young girl in the 1980’s.

I have devoted my adult life to education and my children. Graduating Dekalb Technical College Covington Campus in 2002 and interning for Esquire Mr. John Strauss, Sr. at The Newton County Public Defender’s Office. I have since devoted my life to self – help care and education. Graduating The Respect Institute and sharing my story with others and that there is hope in self – help recovery and that one can strive to thrive. By being a part of View Point Health and New Rock I have found myself striving to become a CPS Certified Peer Specialist teaching and helping others into understanding self -help recovery and whole health management. I have as a grown adult had suicidal thoughts but never a plan and never an intent of mapping out a plan. No suicidal tendencies nor any suicidal ideation. I have shared my story of recovery with others in the hope that no one I know will ever feel so alone that they cannot come to me for help, guidance, care, concern and most importantly understanding and love. I hope that by sharing my recovery story with the physically and mentally challenged that they will grow to understand that life is hard but it is doable. I miss my four girls like something terribly crazy but just know that in time as they grow older things will turn around for the better and greater good. I keep focused on the positive and the nearly 15 years of mothering four girls. Being close to my son has been a wonderful life fulfilling experience and we share and hold a great loving bond. He has spoken of missing his sisters and wondering how they were doing. The 5 children were reared together for over 12 years as siblings. My son being only 18 months old at the time I wed Mr. Sasser.

Having depression is a saddened state in and of itself. Being clinically diagnosed with acute depression can be very troublesome and very tiring if one is not working towards self – help recovery and pushing forward in life through journaling, blogging, reading, reading self -help materials, attending therapy, attending support groups, growing in your education. I have worked hand in hand and taught the physically and mentally challenged that there is always a substitute to suicide and that one should never map out a plan. To call me or to get help immediately. Fortunately I have never suffered dual diagnosis or addictive diseases such as alcohol or drugs but have taken classes and attended AA for the benefit of gaining knowledge of addictive diseases and its victims.

I have been studying from The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration on Recovery.

http://www.samhsa.gov/

September is National Recovery Month celebrating 25 years.

SAMHSA

SAMHSA The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration on Recovery.

As I have been studying has 10 guiding principles of Recovery.

Hope

Person – Driven

Many Pathways

Holistic

Peer Support

Relational

Culture

Addresses Trauma

Strengths/Responsibilities

Respect

Recovery emerges from hope. We studied this at my recent training class through the GPSI GA Peer Support Institute training. Even the smallest flicker of flame can light ones way out of despair.

Self – determination and self – direction are the foundations for recovery as peers and individuals define their own life goals and design their unique paths towards those goals.

Recovery is Non – Linear, characterized by continual growth and improved functioning that may involve set backs. Because set backs are a natural though not inevitable, part of the recovery process it is essential to foster resilience for all individuals and families.

Recovery is holistic. Recovery is supported by peers and allies. Recovery is supported through relationship and social networks. Recovery is culturally based and influenced. Recovery is supported by addressing trauma. The experience of trauma such as physical or sexual abuse, domestic violence, war, disaster and others is often a precursor to or associated with alcohol and drug use, mental health problems and related issues. Services ad supports should be trauma informed to foster safety physical or emotional and trust as well as promote choice, empowerment and collaboration.

I feel that the long history of domestic and family violence I experienced was a precursor to my diagnosis as well do my doctors and Judges.

Definition – A working definition of recovery from mental disorders and or substance use disorders.

A process of change through which individuals improve their health and wellness, live a self – directed life, and strive to reach their full potential.

Through the Recovery Support Strategic Initiative SAMHSA has delineated four major dimensions that support a life in recovery.

Health

Home – A stable and safe place to live.

Purpose – Meaningful daily activities, such as a job, school, volunteerism, family care taking or creative endeavors, and the independence income and resources to participate in society.

Community – Relationships and social networks that provided support, friendship, love and hope.

I feel that being a part of View Point Health and The GA Mental Health Consumer Network has guided me into a new dimension in my life. One where I have been able to study and teach and learn. I am in the Shelter Care Plus Program and pay rent monthly to live in a community apartment. I pay all my bills alone. I have no other support system as far as financially. I take care of myself alone and have now for over ten years. My recent scholarship to attend The GPSI GA Peer Support Institute has allowed me time and the materials to study the manual through the GA Mental Health Consumer Network and add the class to my strengths and list of accomplishments obtained through View Point Health. Being a graduate of New Rock, The Respect Institute, The GA Peer Support Institute and The ACT Team has really helped me grow and mature into being able to make application to become a CPS Certified Peer Specialist for the State of GA one day in my near future. My Certified Peer Specialist Ms. Brenda Williams is an awesome and amazing lady and wonderful CPS. She has been so good to me and always takes the time to care and nurture me when I go to her. Taking the time to care and truly listen. She has been a great mentor in my life and I have learned an awful lot just by watching her as a CPS and how she so lovingly and diligently takes care of her clients and truly applies her life to the care of her clients and peers.

I have recently attended Orientation through a nursing company in the State of GA and hired as a PSA Personal Support Assistant. I hope to be able to be gainfully part time employed giving my all to the physically and mentally challenged that I become blessed to work with each day. Having a part time job in the health field will bring me great joy. I have been actively involved in my community and surrounding areas for many years now but more so over the last nearly 3 years come November as a full time blogger for The Covington News and hope that my photography and community involvement inspire others to become involved locally. To shop, dine and have leisure locally.

As I blog I think back on that suicide attempt as a young teenage girl and often wonder why I did not receive any mental health treatment. I was never given any or the option to have nay mental health care. I was not diagnosed with being mentally challenged until the age of 32 after the precursor of a long history of family abuse and codependency as the caregiver of others with alcohol, drug and gambling problems of their own.

Ms. Brenda my CPS took me to St. Simons Island in August of 2012 and I was able to attend conference given by The GA Mental Health Consumer Network where we studied about self – directed care, The Respect Institute and Holistic healing. She took us all to the beach and lovingly walked us through our agendas. I truly enjoyed that conference and was so happy to become a graduate that year of the St. Simons conference given by The GA Mental Health Consumer Network.

I have prepared a project on the 5 Stages of Recovery but have not presented it as of yet to my peers due to my job hunting and seeking part time work. I have given the project to New Rock and hope to one day in the very near future present my project to my Peers. I have been so busy working with the Supportive Employment Program and trying to obtain part time work so that I may continue to thrive and be able to financially care and maintain myself and to be able to have some sort of small life style to keep me happy and involved in the community.I have went through Orientation, gotten my badge and been hired and am now waiting on my first assignment from my staff case manager.  am so overjoyed about the position and vow to help other physically and mentally challenged with understanding, care, concern, love and the utmost ethics. I have gotten several outfits of scrubs at this point and wore my first pair on Orientation day. It makes me so happy to have obtained a position in the health field and to be working within a company that is also a step in the right and same direction as my CPS Certified Peer Specialist certification which will further and foster my career. And can only be beneficial to me and my peers and my clients. I am overjoyed at the opportunity to work with others who need my help and that I can teach self – directed recovery and whole health wellness to.

I hope and pray that I never again become so depressed and lonely that I have another suicide attempt as I have not had one as an adult only as a young teenage girl. I pray that the Lord continue to bless and direct my paths and show me his Will and Purpose for my life. And prayerfully to one day finally have that family reunification of me, my son and my four daughter’s that  I have so longed for over the last ten plus years. I prayerfully each day express to the Lord the desires of my heart and he has answered me a little each day with each passing and fleeting moment. I have noticed that so many of my prayers have came to pass and for that I am astounded and grateful.

Please do not attempt suicide. You may call 1-800-273-8255 or visit http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org or call Peachford here in Atlanta at 770-455-3200 and speak with an on call nurse and have an assessment. Preventing a full relapse is better than having a complete and total breakdown. Nipping that breakdown in the bud and getting the help and instruction and guidance you need before you suffer relapse is the best policy according to my private psychiatrist Dr. Asaf Aleem of 10 plus years. I have turned to Dr. Aleem many times and he has seen me through many dark days so that I would not relapse. Get in touch with Mr. Joel Slack of The Respect Institute and take a class in The Respect Institute and learn to be an advocate for yourself and tell your story in any forum. I am a proud graduate and thank The Georgia Department of Behavioral Health and Developmental Disabilities for offering the Respect Institute in the State of GA. I have even seen on the Newton County Sheriff’s Office website where Sheriff Mr. Ezell Brown has been in attendance at The Respect Institute training classes. I have worked closely with The Respect Institute staff and in bringing The Respect Institute to my local community.

I cannot stress enough the requirements of becoming a Certified Peer Specialist for the State of Georgia

The Certified Peer Specialist requirements:

1000+ Georgia Certified Peer Specialists Since October 2001

The State has rectified their once mistake time and time again but it has changed nothing as far as the reunification process of me and my daughter’s and my ex- husband continuing to alienate and estrange us by the act of hate. I want this state of GA to know that there have been 1000+ Georgia Certified Peer Specialists Since October 2001. 

And the requirements include:

> Candidates must have diagnosis of mental illness or a dual diagnosis of mental illness and addictive disease and must desire to identify themselves as a person with mental illness current or former consumer of mental health services.

> Applicants must hold a high school diploma or GED and may be requested to provide a copy of this document.

> Must demonstrate strong reading comprehension and written communication skills as indicated on their responses on the pre – test which is part of the application.

> Must have demonstrated experience with leadership, advocacy or governance.

> Must be well grounded in recovery

These facts are taken directly from the Certified Peer Specialist brochure.

The motto of the CPS being “Each One Reach One.”

I feel if I can attend college, work and raise 5 children that I just need to continue to apply until my application is finally chosen.

SAMHSA also talks on Trauma and Justice.

http://www.samhsa.gov/traumaJustice/

I learned of SAMHSA through The GA Mental Health Consumer Network and the GA Peer Support Institute training I have taken.

You may continue to follow my story at my Covington News blog at http://www.covnews.com > community > blogs

I am prayerful that God has even bigger and brighter plans for my life and introduces many more great friends and mentors along my path. There was a time I was forbidden, banned and disallowed any type of literature or reading or writing materials. I thought I would never recover from such a horrific experience but I have thankfully to online social media and therapeutic blogging, journaling, penning and photography. To be forbidden of such golden opportunities is to kill ones soul. At the time I thought I would never see the light of day. That has passed and has been gone but has left a great heartbreak inside of me and a dying grief that I can never escape. I will continue to therapeutically blog of my life’s path and my journey as a PSA Personal Support Assistant for the nursing program.  I have to maintain ethics and privacy of course but will inform you of my journey and the wonders that I experience. Sharing that I have had a wonderful day while adhering to ethics and privacy expected of me. I will continue to be an advocate for myself and my children as that is the new age. Advocacy is in the now and is expected and taught by the State of GA and so many of its departments in health care. I am proud to be a large part of View Point Health, The Respect Institute, The GA Peer Support Institute and The GA Mental Health Consumer Network. I pray each day for a more strong and stable support system and for the Lord our God to broaden my horizons and to broaden and bless my territory.

 

 

 

 

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